When Chaos Reveals Who You Really Are: Alexis Jones

Episode 01

We’re kicking off a new series called For The Love of Calming the Chaos and we’re looking at all the ways chaos invades our lives, how to identify what’s causing it, and how we can forge a way to calmness (at least some of the time). It’s one thing to be busy, tackling the everyday things that need to happen, to feel like you are pulled in a million different directions. It’s another thing to be overwhelmed, where a sense of hopelessness creeps in that the storm of chaos that surrounds your days might never subside. Author and speaker Alexis Jones hit a wall in a life that looked amazing from the outside, but was teeming with chaos and fear on the inside. After several hard-hitting circumstances knocked the wind out of her, she found herself unable to take even the tiniest step forward after living a life that had been full of activity and accomplishments, checking off all the right boxes–and realized she had lost sight of who she really was. Her latest book Joy Hunter: Messy Face Plants, Radical Love, and the Journey That Changed Everything details the story of how she found her way back to herself in the midst of the chaos–and you can too. 

Jen and Alexis talk about: 

  • The moment Alexis realized how the “gift of falling apart” would show her what really mattered
  • When a tidal wave of chaos causes us to falter, how we can take steps to do something differently
  • What it means to be able to find true joy after true sorrow 
  • How you can reconnect with a version of yourself that is real and authentic
Episode Transcript

Hey everybody. Jen Hatmaker here, your host of the For The Love Podcast. Welcome to the show. I love it when I get to introduce a brand new series. That’s always one of my favorite episodes of every year when we get to like, roll out the next handful of weeks where we’re gonna kind of gather around the table around a central idea. And so today kicks off a new series called For The Love Of Calming, the Chaos. I don’t know if I need to explain why we chose this as a series right now. It almost makes me feel emotional. I feel a little bit tight in my throat when I just think about it; there’s just days right now I look around the world and just go, this wasn’t meant to be this way. You know? Like, everything is so noisy and it feels so chaotic, and there’s so much loss and struggle and dissension and disappointment.

And to some degree, that’s just how it’s always been, right? Like every generation has had this experience. It’s not like we’re the first generation to live in a chaotic world. It just feels acute right now. And so we over here at the show, we’re like, what if we built a series around this idea of bringing calm to the chaos in a lot of different ways? It’s gonna have a lot of different facets. But what would it look like to peel this down? Is it possible? Is it possible to experience something close to calmness or peace in the midst of what is undeniably chaotic for every one of us? And so that’s what this series looks like. I feel like we’ve expertly chosen our first episode, our first guest, to introduce a series.

I mean, I just, I never took a breath during this episode. I was just so connected and listening and identifying and feeling inspired and feeling something gentle move through my heart and mind over the course of this entire conversation. So I know that you know what it feels like to make all the plans in the world, and even like, work your little fingers to the bone, fall asleep at your laptop, have these big, huge dreams, and then even then they don’t add up, right? Or it’s like a series of disappointments and losses and it’s painful and you’ve tried, and you’ve planned and you organized. And then even then, even still, it could all unravel and fall short. And, for someone like me,and my guest today, it’s even harder when you’ve been used to self-medicating through like validation and excellence and getting gold stars.

I mean, you know, I understand that I’m an Enneagram three and I have this shiny life. Well, it wasn’t as shiny, of course, behind closed doors, it never is, but it was what I presented at least. And then when that falls away and you’re just left with, well, the truth of it all, what then? And so our guest today reminds us, pain is often the portal to the best stuff in life. And I just unfortunately have to tell you that that has been completely true for me. So you guys, I wanna welcome to this brand new series, our first guest today, we’re talking to Alexis Jones. And let me tell you about Alexis, if you don’t already know her. She is an internationally recognized speaker and activist and writer. You might have read her wildly popular book called I Am That Girl.

And she has just released a brand new one called Joy Hunter, Messy Face Plants, Radical Love, and the Journey That Changed Everything, which we’re gonna talk about. And, you’re gonna be so glad that you downloaded today. Know this guys, when Alexa speaks, people pay attention. She has been featured on a little thing called Oprah’s Super Soul 100. She’s been invited to speak at the White House, the UN, Harvard, Google, Facebook, as a “Profiles in Power” winner. She was even called one of the five most influential women in Texas. And since there are a lot of influential women in Texas, wink, that’s no small thing. So Alexis and her husband Brad, along with their spoil alert, brand new little boy named Bridger, they live in Bozeman, Montana. And fun fact number one, Brad is a retired pro basketball player.

Number two, Brad used to be in our youth group when we very first moved to Austin, Texas in the year 2000. He played high school basketball. And then we went on to watch him play in college and on to watch him play in pro. I have known him for over 20 years, and he is an absolute delight in his own right. And I tell Alexis this right out of the gate, but I remember seeing Brad at a UT basketball game so long ago, and he was like, you gotta meet my wife. Like, you really have to. She is special and you are kindred. And he was not wrong. You guys are gonna love Alexis. Remember, if you like to watch interviews, go over to the YouTube channel because you’ll get to see her and watch us talk, which is, I don’t know, that’s how I experience all the podcasts. So that’s my favorite way, of course, is to see my guests tell their stories. But, please enjoy this conversation. I know that you’re going to, it’s captivating. It is refreshing, it’s relatable and it’s super hopeful. Talk about inserting an injection of calm into the chaos. I’m delighted, delighted to bring my conversation with a just wonderful, but beautiful, but absolutely dynamite, Alexis Jones.

 

 


Mentioned in this Episode: 

 

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I Am That Girl
by Alexis Jones

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Joy Hunter
by Alexis Jones

 


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