Women, listen up: Guess what you can do, handle, manage, reorganize, and execute? Everything.
Yes I am talking to those of you navigating a divorce, but also to all of you. Even if you are hap-hap-happily married, and you’ve handed over certain responsibilities as a normal division of labor like I did, it is not wise or prudent to be totally hands off.
My shtick for years was a little cutesy dumb shoulder shrug, a helpless lady who has no idea what any bills are or how much money I make:
- I don’t understand our bills. *shrug*
- I don’t know what is coming or going. *shrug*
- I’m just a girl who RUNS A MAJOR CAREER OPERATION AND WORKS HER ASS OFF but idk if we are investing or saving or where our money is being spent. *shrug*
- I just don’t do that part. *shrug*
- I’m sure it’s all going fine. *shrug*
That is not fair to either partner. It’s a new day, sisters. You can and should be privy to every penny, and if you are newly single, you can handle all of this. Grab your own bull by the horns. This is not beyond you. Build your own future. It will be like a full-time job until you get it in hand, but we deserve to be in charge of our own lives.
The F-Word No One Warned Us About: Finances After Divorce
The first time I sat in my accountant’s office was in the middle of my divorce in 2020. And let me tell you—I knew absolutely nothing about finances, much less my own. It was a full-on F-word situation. Times a million.
Fast-forward to today, and I’m not just surviving—I’m steering my own financial ship with confidence and clarity. But it took work. It took a calendar full of appointments with my accountant, bookkeeper, financial planner, mortgage consultant, and banker. It took questions I didn’t even know to ask and a whole lot of believing I could do it, even when I wanted to crawl under a weighted blanket forever.
If you’re here, googling things like how to survive a divorce financially or financial advice for divorced women, I want you to know: You’re not alone, and this is absolutely doable.
Let’s talk about starting over financially after divorce—especially in midlife when the stakes feel sky-high.
Financial Divorce Tips That Actually Work
When you’re in the thick of it—splitting assets, sorting out debt, trying to refinance a home after divorce—it’s easy to feel like the whole thing is stacked against you. But here’s the truth: Financial planning after divorce is just like anything else we’ve mastered in life—it starts with one brave, clumsy step.
1. Get Eyes on Everything
Finances and divorce advice 101: You need visibility.
Ask yourself:
- Am I a signatory on every bank account?
- Do I have access to every login and password?
- Do I know where my money is going every month?
- Am I aware and involved in my savings and investments?
If the answer is no, start there. This was step one for me—and the scariest. But information is power, and power is peace.
2. Create a Post-Divorce Financial Checklist
A divorce financial checklist will be your best friend. It should include:
- Reviewing your credit report
- Creating a realistic budget (don’t skip this!)
- Inventorying all your debts and liabilities
- Gathering account statements, beneficiary info, and estate docs
You don’t have to figure all of this out overnight. But step by step, you will.
3. Know the Difference Between Good and Bad Debt
One of the best pieces of financial divorce advice I can offer is this: Not all debt is created equal.
- Bad debt (like high-interest credit cards)? We tackle that first.
- Good debt (like a home loan)? That can wait.
Take a look at your interest rates. Consider refinancing your home if your mortgage rate is high. Ask for help. There are trusted pros who can walk you through this.
How to Recover Financially After Divorce: Mindset + MATH
Recovery is part math, part mindset. And I want you to have both.
Own Your Financial Story
Here’s what I want you to know: You can do this. You should do this. You must do this. There is nothing you cannot figure out and handle.
Build a Realistic Budget After Divorce
Yes, the B-word. But listen: Budgeting after divorce isn’t about restriction—it’s about clarity and freedom. Budgeting is the North Star that helps us make empowered decisions, not fearful ones.
Use a tool like the “Now-Near-Far” framework from my course to plan:
- Now = Emergency savings
- Near = 3-5 year goals (new car, tuition, travel)
- Far = Retirement, long-term investments
Get Help. Seriously.
You’re not supposed to know all of this. That’s why professionals exist. There’s no shame in bringing experts in to help you. You don’t have to carry this alone. You don’t have to pretend you have it all figured out. Just start.
Your Future Self Will Thank You
Whether you’re looking for information about how to get out of debt after divorce or divorce financial planning, I want you to know that this is just the beginning—not the end.
Yes, it might feel like divorce ruined me financially in the beginning. But with the right steps, it can also be the beginning of building a stronger, smarter, more secure financial future than you ever had before.
You can rise like a phoenix. And you don’t have to do it alone.
Ready to Take the Next Step?
Start your financial comeback with my self-paced course: Finance for the Rest of Us — designed for women just like you.
It’s the course I wish I had when I was starting over. It’s everything I’ve learned—all shared with you—plus, the expert guidance of financial planning ninja Lindsey Leaverton. And for a limited time, you can save $44 on this course (because we’re all about saving money here). Use code FREEDOM25 to get this course for ONLY $25. This offer expires April 30, 2025.
Yes—you can do this. Let’s build a new story. Together.
